And here we are.

I was all set to write a reflective post, as I do every birthday, and somehow the day got away from me. (I think a giant, ride-on turtle had something to do with it.) I'm 25 now, which I kept saying the whole week made me feel really old, but now that I'm in unfamiliar surroundings, I just feel young, inexperienced and naive again. (Was I ever truly naive? I can hardly use that word to describe me.) Or maybe it's merely the stress of not knowing exactly where I am at every moment. I can navigate DC enough to get by, for now. I get the grid, I know my compass directions, but I'm still learning whether I'm going to Branch Ave or Greenbelt when I go home on the green line. In Portland, I never ever for a single moment felt lost. Perhaps that's the listlessness, the emotional detachment that I really started feeling in June--an anticipation of not knowing. I thought I had grown to be more okay with not knowing, and I think on the whole I am. I just also had a lot of other stuff to deal with: packing up my things, leaving my family, friends, and boyfriend, leaving a city that I know like the back of my hand, feeling a bit intimidated by this whole grad school thing.

Note: DC trannies seem to be much more nonchalant about their tranniness.

I'd tried to find roommates but my communications with them have turned out to be fruitless. It looks like I'll be on my own for a studio, and I'm fine with that. The happy thing about inflated DC rents (relative to PDX) is that you do, to some extent, get what you pay for. IHoMGS had no dishwasher, no AC, no doorman, no pool, no parking, no fitness center, etc. My studio near Dupont Circle will probably have all these things. I'm not sure that's worth an extra $400-500 but it does make up for some of the price.

Note: the CVS in Dupont Circle smells strongly of formaldehyde.

I've been fairly indecisive in my search for housing this week. Two potential roommates didn't work out so I'd been hamstrung by figuring that out. I've mostly spent my time exploring the city--I walked 11.5 miles on Tuesday, causing three gigantic blisters on my feet and throwing me into recovery mode for the past few days. I think my muscles are no longer sore today, which is nice. I have been getting other necessities completed like my homework for my principles class, setting up a bank account, getting my IDA forms to begin the disbursal process, navigating the financial aid system, swimming in Jane's pool (which is a necessity given the humidity), planning my class schedule, etc. It would appear that I won't have class on Mondays. Fairly exciting. There's a class called Behavioral Sociology in Sectarian and International Conflict that I'm very excited to take.

Note: one of SAIS's neighbors is the Embassy of Uzbekistan.

When you are quitting smoking, experts recommend that you use moving to rid yourself of the habit because all your cues for habitual behavior are gone. I see myself in a somewhat similar light, though of course I have no tobacco habit to kick. I feel more aware of certain patterns of behavior and seem to be having more control over changing the ones I don't like. I'm drinking lots more water. I'm making healthier food choices. Jane might disagree, but I feel a little neater than was my standard in Portland. I hope it lasts. I think it will. In a certain sense, I think I will be reborn here, in that I have a better shot at improving myself in the ways that have been niggling minor issues that take up entirely too much of my emotional space.